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The Elves Packed My Sack. Why?, various artists (Mistletunes, 2010)

elvespacked.jpg
And so it was that the musicians struck up their instruments to make a mighty noise in celebration of the Christmas holiday. As you'll see if you have the disc in hand, 24 of the biggest such noises comprise this year's Mistletunes mix disc. If you don't, well, this is where a strong imagination comes in handy. Thanks for visiting, and now, onward to the 2010 Claus-town rundown:

"Santa Looked a Lot Like Daddy," Bowling For Soup -- These guys are known for their snarky lyrics, particularly on the song "1985," in which the band babe of that year is today's soccer mom. Here they grab an old country standard by Buck Owens and make a punk rock anthem out of it.

"We Three Kings," Blondie -- Sounds like an outtake from their salad days, but this actually went out late in 2009 as a teaser for an album that is now scheduled to come out in 2011. No one expects Melchior, Balthazar, and Casper to be hanging on the telephone while the man from Mars eats up bars, cars and guitars, but here you have it.

"Wish List," Neon Trees -- Here's a strong rocking power pop original from a band that quite frankly hadn't been on my radar until now.

"Fruitcake," The Superions -- This is Fred Schneider from the B-52s, as if you could miss him, along with a couple of musician friends helping him do a side project dedicated to the holidays. And since fruitcakes lend themselves to mockery, who better to sing about them, right?

"Squat," Shelby Lynne -- This isn't on her new Christmas album, and I can't imagine why not; it's a real-life story that fits the diminished expectations of this current year.

"Shut Up and Let It Snow," The Ting Tings -- The original version of this song once was an iPod commercial; for BBC Radio, the hit-making duo stripped things down to just acoustic guitar and tinseled up the lyrics.

"Christmas Day With Me," Laura Vane and the Vipertones -- Old-school soul is especially well-loved in Europe, and this British-Dutch ensemble thoughtfully gave away this original holiday dance tune to its website visitors.

"Party Hard," Little Isidore -- This guy apparently haunts the doo-wop revivals, but this number manages to sound old and new all at the same time. Hey, did anybody spike the eggnog yet?

"Boots," The Killers -- This big-sounding rock ballad incorporates samples from "It's a Wonderful Life" while the lyrics paint an impressionistic view of that popular movie's storyline. Folks who actually bought this single are helping to fight AIDS in Africa, by the way.

"Getting Ready For Christmas Day," Paul Simon -- Come on, lots of Jewish guys do Christmas songs. Here the iconic singer-songwriter gets help getting right with the holidays from samples of a 1930s preacher. Paul has a little experience here, as he and Garfunkel did a double-sided holiday single back in the day that never came out but did land on their box set. And then there was the social commentary of "Silent Night/7 O'Clock News."

"Tiny Tree Christmas," Guster -- A sweet little number that creeps up on you with little cat feet. Appropriate, since this band once did a version of "Carol of the Bells" in which they meowed the entire thing.

"Christmas Tree," Lady Gaga -- This actually came out a couple of years ago before she became the name above the headline, so consider this my attempt at catching up to the hype.

"In the Snow," Rumbar Girls -- Shameless hype for an Austrian rum company, but it's still fun. Puts that whole Train/Coca-Cola thing into perspective, and it makes Lady Gaga look like B.J. Leiderman, the guy who wrote the theme music for NPR's newscasts.

"I'm Dreaming of a Green Christmas," MC Lars featuring Jaret Reddick -- A great bit of white-boy hip-hop in service of the holiday and the environment. Let's all stand outside Sen. Inhofe's office and blast this to him, like John Cusack did with Ione Skye in "Say Anything."

"Miracle," Matisyahu -- This disc's nod to Hanukkah is this excellent reggae number specifically about this holiday by the noted conservative Jew and reggae singer.

"James Brown Died On Christmas Day," Hands and Knees -- A perfect observation that needs to be brought up a little more often, especially in regard to the Godfather of Soul's extensive Christmas catalog. And it's a bit unexpected to hear this notion voiced by a lo-fi indie rock band.

"Ain't No Chimneys In the Projects," Sharon Jones & the Dap-Kings -- A perfect follow-up to the previous song, in which this Sixties-obsessed soul band tells a story similar to that of James' iconic "Santa Claus Go Straight To the Ghetto."

"Northpole 4-5789," The Yule Logs -- These guys are actually a Christmas band year-round, and this parody of the old Marvelettes hit on Motown is off their second album.

"Mary," RPM -- And while we're on the topic of parodies, the Jersey Boys themselves see their big hit "Sherry" remade into a holiday song by what apparently is a Christian band. It's a note-perfect 4 Seasons tribute.

"George and Andrew," The Boy Least Likely To -- This quirky band knocked out an entire Christmas album this year, and this original song is a tribute to and a parody of the holiday hit "Last Christmas," with lyrics referencing the members of Wham. This is one for the insufferable music snobs out there.

"This Child," Donnie Iris and the Cruisers -- These Pittsburgh-area hitmakers also did a full Christmas album this year and this is the obvious single from it, a strong power-pop outing on an original song that references several classic carols.

"Christmas Soon," JP, Chrissie and the Fairground Boys -- A great piece of work from the leader of the Pretenders and singer-songwriter JP Jones, whose album chronicles the rise and fall of their personal relationship together. A strong example of Chrissie Hynde's classic sound filtered through a more Americana approach.

"Gonna Have a Party," Saint Etienne -- This cult club-music band from Britain has been making Christmas songs on the sly for years, and this is a fresh outing guaranteed to fill the dance floor.

"Merry Something To You," Devo -- Because making the last song on a Christmas mix a New Year's concoction is such a cliché, I thought I'd finish up with this snarky nod to every belief tradition by the Akron spudboys. They did forget to mention Festivus, though.

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