The Flesh Eating Rollerskate Holiday Joyride, Psychostick (Rock Ridge)

UPDATE: This album got a major update for 2025, with the original tunes remixed and remastered and a couple new ones added: "AEt," a thrasher that appears to be a jaundiced look at holiday sugar intake, and the even more intense "Everybody Christmas," which they're promoting as a single. Album cover and link to Amazon are updated at right. END UPDATE. Those of you whose life paths carry you a little too close to the retail sector might well be sick of Christmas already. If that's you, these guys might well be your holiday soundtrack, assuming metal crunch with a side order of laughs is your favored genre. On this 2007 disc, "Holiday Hate" brings the bitch list with its "Consumers gotta BUY" chorus, its declaration that Santa doesn't exist and its complaint that Christmas goodies make us fat. Despite the fact that Santa doesn't exist, he turns out to be a "Jollly Old Sadist" who doesn't come through on the wish lists unless you really wanted a shirt box full of socks. "Jingle Bell Metal" is pretty much as advertised, "Silent Night" is nothing of the kind, though it's only 25 seconds long, "Red Snow" is Rudolph's snuff-horror fantasy, causing Johnny Marks to roll over in his grave no doubt, and how else to cap off the festivities than with "Happy F- New Year."